Peace?

Finding peace within me has always been difficult. I am too scared to face my demons so I could move forward with my kids and life. Now that my mother is gone, I feel I could really let go and not worry about that past life any longer. My family is trying to keep me within their reach, but it is too late.

I need this next chapter positive and from all the damage from my past far away from my kids. I am missing all the great moments as they all get older, need to focus on the positive. How that is so hard to do.  The friends I call family have been there to pull me out of the dumps when I feel I am falling in too deep. My boyfriend trying to reach out to help me through all these tribulations.  Peace is something I crave and so afraid of….Why?  What could be so scary about peace and happiness? Do I not deserve it? 

When will I know these answers?